In the last few months,
black females as well as their interactions
– or can I say, absence thereof – have already been acquiring lots of interest.
The Arizona Article
has been doing several features upon it. After That ABC’s

Nightline

did a tv show inquiring exactly why there are many single black colored females.

All of a sudden the mainstream news is actually having an enthusiastic curiosity about all of our love life. The audience is becoming told that there is a ‘crisis’ amongst black colored females, specifically informed specialist women, who are seemingly not able to find a ‘decent’ black colored guy.

There is no question it’s a subject that sparks warmed up discussions and discussions amongst black colored people. This has for many years. But is it really that bad? Or is the mass media – now that it has discovered a hot subject – exploiting this matter for several it’s well worth? I am an informed black colored lady and I really haven’t any issue with meeting eligible, informed, fantastic black colored men. If we decide to big date them is an additional thing, but they are online.

I’m significantly perturbed by the slew of tales about subject. These include adverse, unhelpful and simply are designed to perpetuate unfavorable tips about black colored men and women which become self-fullfiling. They essentially state ‘oh, poor black colored females. They decide to try so hard but cannot find a great man … Boo hoo, black ladies are victims. Ooh, it is all the error of the pathetic black guys. You realize, they usually have no training or tend to be locked-up in prison.’ Sorry, but i actually do not contribute to that view.

Many reasons exist exactly why black women can be solitary. And it’s not because of the black colored guy. Maybe not having individual duty nor handling unexplored baggage from past performs way more of a task than everyone believe. We women can be not totally all simply saints who possess to fight against bad guys. Unnecessary folks ladies believe that a
greater degree and a beneficial wage
are enough to make all of us great mates. As I’ve created before, we
ladies are perhaps not victims in matchmaking
and it’s really completely disempowering for us purchasing into these shows and posts which benefit from perpetuating the theory that we tend to be.

As an individual black girl I’m really interested in hearing from joyfully married black lovers on how they came across and what makes all of them tick. We now have

Michelle and Barack Obama

, a beautiful happily married black colored pair into the White residence. Exactly why can’t we concentrate on how exactly we can emulate lovers like that?

Pay attention to

Dr Boyce Watkins

and that I chat this matter away and let us know what you believe.